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priyankaš¦
@priyanka
i envy some of you a lot sometimes. i see you all make friends so effortlessly and let people in your inner or outter circle and form lil communities and think to myself that i wish i didnāt have the bad experiences that i did and i wish i was able to trust people and give them a chance to be in my life more easily i wish i didnāt make them pass a made up test in my mind and only then allow them in. it also doesnāt help that pattern recognition picks up on things that others donāt and it makes it harder to trust people. it doesnāt help that strong sense of justice makes it difficult to see things between the black and white. iām so tired of being this way. so so tired.
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priyankaš¦
@priyanka
(itās not that i donāt have friends who love me, thatās not what this is about)
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ā½Seleneā¾
@selenevisions
Thanks for being vulnerable Pri I just want to say that things almost always are different from the outside Most of us has similar patterns around trust, Iām sure everyone has been betrayed multiple times Personally feeling safe with people has been my lifelong issue but also my focus in therapy for more than a decade. Iām still scared but I try because Iāve been isolated for many years and itās not worth it at all The mindset that helps me is that we are all people and make mistakes and got multiple sides, bad good and in between so itās cool whatever happens as long as Iām ok with myself Our efforts, our sincerity and who we are will never be cancelled because some people might not be in the same wavelength- be it malicious or not, in the end how we behave to others is how we behave to ourselves so their behaviour speaks to their inner world and has nothing to do with us most of the times Thanks for opening the convo š¤
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Ivy
@ivy
this resonates itās really really really hard not to let bad experiences really change how you interact with the world
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