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jessyfries
@jessyjeanne
hi 😔 having a shitty day, got a bad news yesterday. looking for an urgent flight but everything is too fukin expensive can you guys tell me a joke pls? i really need something to lift up my mood rn ….
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chicago
@chicago
I pulled these from reddit and they are weak ass jokes, but I went through like 20 of them: --- What do you call a dinosaur that takes care of its teeth? A Flossiraptor --- A woman goes to buy a parrot and notices the prices are $100, $200, and $15. Curious, she asks why the last one is so cheap. The shopkeeper replies, "That one used to live in a brothel." Amused, she decides to buy it for $15. When she brings the parrot home, it immediately says, "Well, I'll be damned, a new brothel!" The woman can't help but laugh. Later, when her daughters arrive home, the parrot chirps, "Well, look at that, two new ladies of the night!" The girls burst into laughter too. But when the dad walks in, the parrot exclaims, "Well, I'll be damned, Pete! Long time no see!" --- My husband texted me this morning and said, “Your great”. I replied, “No, you’re great”. He’s been in a great mood ever since. I should correct his grammar more often.
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jessyfries pfp
jessyfries
@jessyjeanne
lol the second one 😭
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