@bfg
What we don't control - Daily Stoic for Builders - Day 9
Epictetus wrote:
"Some things are in our control, while others are not. We control our opinion, choice, desire, aversion, and, in a word, everything of our own doing. We don't control our body, property, reputation, position, and, in a word, everything not of our own doing. Even more, the things in our control are by nature free, unhindered, and unobstructed, while those not in our control are weak, slavish, can be hindered, and are not our own." - Enchiridion
I feel that hearing the truth about how much we control, and how much we don't, in so simple and naked words, is tough for builders. We want to believe we control much more. It gives us a sense of security and power. It's a false sense, as stoics would claim, but it still feels better than helplessness.
Here is the problem. We think once we don't control outcomes of something, we're helpless. But it's not true.
I can't control external events of today. Neither can you. But we can control our opinion about these events - good/bad, fair/unfair, futile/justified, etc.
We can control what we think or do about them, too - does it help me do what I want to do, or become who I want to become?
You see how anything I don't control - clients, karma, algorithms, weather, internet speed, Ethereum gas fees - carries with it a part that only I control? That's the balance.
I find this very refreshing, albeit hard to swallow, as a way to gain a clear view of daily situations and potential actions.
Especially for A-players who, by their nature, believe they can bend others and the world to their will.
Try it for yourself - it may just be what you need to see clearly where to focus your attention.