CoCo’s Guide to a Complete and Healthy Life.💓
There is a precision to being alive. You must boil the egg for exactly 15 minutes and take the trash out before nightfall and remember to call your mother- you do not know how much longer she (or you) will be around. You must get out of bed in the morning and inhale as you place your feet on the cold floor, do not look mournfully at the warmth in the disorganized blankets and slight dent in the mattress you are leaving behind as you plunge your feet into slightly sandy shoes and go about being able to afford that warmth.
You must study and pray and eat and study again and cry sometimes but only in secret because people will mock you from their own tear stained pillowcase. How dare you seek community, or empathy? What happened to your shame?
You must balance on the fine edge of the knife that is kindness without stupidity, do not forget that a little bit of cruelty is necessary so that the crueler people do not take your heart to the grindstone and strip it of all it’s meat and pink and life.
You must fall in love without lifelines, except the lifeline everyone will ask about if you hit the ground and no rope stretches taut to catch you.
(You really trusted her that much? Don’t you know how women are?)
You must make sure your pride exists with humility, and put enough rejection in your tone to stop the strange man from pursuing you but not enough that he decides to kill you instead. You must be loud but quiet, gentle and ready to change but harsh and unyielding about certain things that define you, unless it is time to change those things, if not the world will move forward and you will remain behind.
(Are you getting confused? You need to keep up)
You must know when to fold and when to return home, when to be recklessly brave and when your bravery will be termed stupidity, when to throw caution to the wind and go racing down the highway with wind in your hair; and when to fall to your knees before the stained glass windows at the cathedral and atone to a god you do not believe in.
All the things that make you feel alive are the wrong things, except when they are not. Theft is okay if you are starving, except your body has not yet started wasting and you still have a roof over your head. It’s okay to be an idiot in love with an idiot in love with you, except when the other idiot stands up and you are suddenly naked in a dance circle, and all of the villagers are laughing.
(How do you not know the difference? Did nobody teach you these things?)
A sacrifice is a pious thing only if it works out, and you have no way to find out until after, but you should know; (Do you have no sense at all?) It’s okay to escape as far as you always come back, the arms of despair are far reaching, it will touch you beneath that boy, on top that mountain, at the bottom of that bottle. Nobody quite knows how to escape it. Have you tried Jesus? Cocaine? Rolling your eyes to the back until only the whites show? A cold sprite? What about a cupcake?
Okay, hold my hand, pray with me, this deep unescapable feeling that you are a flailing body pinned beneath a knife with a mountain squatting on your chest is not your portion, amen. Do you feel better now? Well, maybe there’s something wrong with you.
Pursue your dreams only if they are realistic, unrealistic ones only end up in shallow graves, except for when they don’t. No, you are not the exception. But what if you are? Do you want to find out? Are you brave? Stupid? Reckless? You don’t know? I think stupid is the answer. You should know these things.
What are you going to do with your future? You don’t know yet? That’s okay because your parents are rich. Right? Oh. 10 replies
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