rushil on Farcaster

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I’ll be going to Asia for most likely three months. September will be attending Network School around Malaysia and Singapore. October will most likely be India and Korea. November will be Vietnam and Thailand. I will be working remotely from there without my company knowing. This will be a challenge because I’ll have to work nights to match the EST meetings. I’ll be free to attend lectures and event during the day, so it’ll be a packed September. For now, I enjoy my summer in toronto. I haven’t given much thought about my travels, but now that there’s a couple of months left, I need to get my shit together. Ive been casting a lot about men and women and relationship dynamics because that’s one conflict I currently face. I have a girlfriend. She’s the first relationship I’ve had that wasn’t a situationship. We started seeing each other on February. After a couple of months with her, I’m fond of what we have, but I grow uneasy as the days inch closer to my nomadic journey.

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The things to address is where her and i are in the relationship. Now, though it was rushed, we were both infatuated with each other initially. As time passed, we’ve grown comfortable together. As September comes, I contemplate whether we should break up. This is tough because it’s far from what I felt when we started dating on February. Yes, five months is short lived, which some would even consider as a situationship. The intentions for a relationship is not expecting an end date when starting out. Situationships take comfort in the certainity of an end date whereas relationships are uncertain because ideally, there wouldnt be an end date. I’ve had situationships, and they werent nearly as intimate as the four months ive spent with the girl im with. Now, the question is why break up at all? Three months long distance is doable. If the relationship is thriving, it can survive the hiatus. My response would be my issues with commitment.

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Yes, commitment issues with men is a cliche reason to break up. Yes, this is an immature and toxic reason, yes, but it’s a conflict i deal with regardless. I do not think I’ll be able to pay much attention to the relationship while I’m away. I’m estimating the lack of effort I’ll be putting in, and because of that I contemplate breaking up. It wouldn’t be fair to string her along for the time being, and each day I spend with her while thinking about a breakup is selfish. I’m upset at the thought of no contact, but I think I’ll be fine. I question if this is how I’ll be in future relationships, and fear getting in one all the more

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i think this deserves a bigger convo before the breakup — my partner and i spent a good amnt of time long distance (IST to EST) and we were both rlly busy the whole time. distance isn’t about the amount of effort but the quality of effort. you gotta want to choose each other every day even if that day went by with no contact. if you can do that, it’s worth not letting go just yet. but if not then don’t make it worse for both of you by dragging it on

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yes tyty this is amazing advice and just what I’ve been thinking about as well. The difference between you and i is my willingness to continue. No girl wants to hear whether her bf is willing to put up with her, but in my case, I can’t help but feel like it’s time to let go. I’ve already had the convo two days ago, no breakup yet but the awareness of my uneasiness has been explained. Blindsidedness is inevitable when two parties involve themselves together

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