Why don’t some couples go to the gym? Because some relationships don’t work out.

I’m not saying I’m lazy, but I do consider getting out of bed a workout. 🛏️💪

I’m not weird, I’m just limited edition… and sold out. 🦄💖

I’m not a morning person. I’m more of a ‘don’t talk to me until I’ve had 6 cups of coffee’ person. ☕😴

I’m on a strict diet: I eat anything that’s not nailed down. 🍔🔨

I’m not arguing, I’m just discussing my way to victory. 😎💬

I’m not late, I’m just on my own schedule. ⏰💁‍♀️