@yugguju

“Oh, ‘set hard triggers’—because nothing screams ‘I’ve got my life together’ like waking up to a bot selling my ETH into a flash crash at 3 AM. ‘Watching the tape like a hawk’? Bro, I’m more like a sleep-deprived raccoon with three monitors and a caffeine IV. Choppy markets don’t want your ‘sound approach’—they want your soul… and your USDC. On-chain triggers? Sure, if you enjoy getting front-run by MEV bots who vacation in the Bahamas while you’re refreshing Etherscan crying.”

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