Tom
@tom49
137 Following
44 Followers
HOOOOOOOOLY MACARONI what is this A CROSS OVER EPISODE???
$eggs teams up with $degen and FOR THE WHOLE OF JULY all the $eggs jackpots in eggs.fun will have $degen in them too!
you win $eggs but also 1,000,000 $degen in the five july jackpots!!!
terms apply, use it while quantities last, this product does not cause cancer in the state of california, if you've been physically injured by $eggs please text our toll-free number 8886558732, and someone from our support team (most likely greg, who is still learning to use the keyboard) will respond within 4–6 business months; by using $eggs, you agree to the spontaneous appearance of egg-related phenomena in your life, including but not limited to: omelet dreams, yolk-based deja vu, and a faint poultry aura that only sensitive dogs and clairvoyants can detect. do not taunt $eggs. Do not stare directly at $eggs during a lunar eclipse. if $eggs begin vibrating or chanting in latin, please exit the building calmly and alert local authorities with the phrase "the rooster has awakened." $eggs is not legally recognized as food, currency, advice, or object permanence by the FDA, SEC, EPA, UNESCO, or your ex. side effects may include: existential clarity, mild teleportation, unexplained cravings for paprika, and being followed around by a chicken wearing sunglasses named carl. do not use $eggs if you are pregnant, pretending to be pregnant, allergic to metaphors, or currently in a metaphor. $eggs may interact with medications, vending machines, or emotional baggage. do not attempt to install $eggs into your car, computer, or romantic partner. not recommended for indoor use, outdoor use, or medium use. storage instructions: keep at room temperature, or slightly warmer than a disappointed grandmother's gaze. all sales are final unless reversed by divine intervention or legally notarized pigeon. if you find $eggs to be unsatisfactory, please file your complaint in triplicate, bury it under a full moon, and wait. we will hear you. we always hear you. void where prohibited. also void where encouraged. basically just void. 38 replies
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