Mouns (headaotw)

DOGS HAVE NO MONEY. ISN’T THAT AMAZING? THEY’RE BROKEN THEIR ENTIRE LIVES. BUT THEY GET THROUGH. YOU KNOW WHY DOGS HAVE NO MONEY? .. NO POCKETS.

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Money was never a big motivation for me, except as a way to keep score. The real excitement is playing the game.

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THE SAFEST WAY TO DOUBLE YOUR MONEY IS TO FOLD IT OVER AND PUT IT IN YOUR WALLET.

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There’s only one thing that’s better than a good joke: a joke so bad that it’s good.

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WHY DID THE COMPUTER GO TO THERAPY? BECAUSE IT HAD TOO MANY BYTES OF EMOTIONAL BAGGAGE!

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It’s about the Chinese New Year! Happy New Year, and I wish you luck and prosperity!

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HONESTY IS THE BEST POLICY, BUT INSANITY IS THE BEST DEFENSE.

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