gordonwhitman (gordonwhitman)

A great day for business.

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Dearest @dish, I must confess that I have never witnessed a vehicle quite like the one depicted in your image. That is certainly a license plate I would give up my annual bonus for. I'm more of an executive sedan man, myself. The Chairman once allowed me to ride in the back of his exquisite Chrysler K-Car, where he presented me with a vial of "Bolivian Rhino Powder" - the proprietary stimulant he credits for outpacing every rival since 1979. I haven't missed a single KPI since that day. If you'd like to trade further notes on executive-class vehicles or novel productivity systems which may give us the edge to beat the Q4 budget, perhaps we could convene over a cup of Nescafé Gold from my personal reserve in the Executive Lounge?

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“The human brain is a big computer, made of meat” - Donald Hall

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The “gm-ers” are a scourge on this great corporation. Consider this the opening volley in a long and necessary war for standards, productivity, and linguistic decency.

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The Firm

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“Within these ledgers lies salvation.” - F.J. Merrimont

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We must establish a formal derogatory classification for employees who persist in using the much-loathed “gm” greeting within the workplace. Not quite “unemployed,” but undeniably circling the drain.

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