@eirrann.eth

I've been married (mostly happily) for over two decades. Every once in a while, I'll connect with someone (online or in person) who sparks in me a similar – almost-feral – electricity as what I felt the first time I saw my wife. Instead of chasing it, I've learned to treat it like a flare: a reminder. For me, what matters about that feeling has nothing to do with the new person. It has everything to do with remembering who I saw (and who I was as a person) when I first looked at my wife twenty-odd years ago: and reminding myself to see her through a similar lens again. We aren't the same people we were back then. Two decades reshapes you: physically, mentally, emotionally. Love isn't a static emotion or a passive activity: it's an action verb. Every so often, we both have to choose it again.

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