why did apple make everything look like it’s trapped in a supermonkeyball

a "white collar murph" is when you WFH in a 20lb weighted vest, squeezing in 100 pull-ups, 200 push-ups and 300 squats in between meetings vest stays on in the meetings

a “papa murph” is when you put on a 30lb weighted vest (child) and chase two other weighted vests on bikes 1 mile to a park where you have to pick up every acorn and cool stick. you carry the bikes a mile back and then cook ribs for everyone

made this suck less if you wanna know your daily bests

found a shirt i like. you know what that means, fellas. time to buy it in two colors

what if irl enshittification is just a product of all ambition and talent getting vacuumed into empty white collar work and the world actually could get better with max critical thinking faculties instead being directly applied to improve the end-user experience (hospitality)

kids threw a bunch of stuff in the cart. wasn’t paying attention, bought it all. nonstop bangers. never paying attention again

our new family tradition is forgetting to buy food the night before stores are closed and then just surviving

damn i’m like a cinnamon roll guy now. i’ve been icing-pilled. i love brown butter, i love everything about these. how can we live in a universe where both suffering and cinnamon rolls exist

if you’re staring at a leftover ham hock today don’t forget fabada exists

i showed my father-in-law a christmas movie made around 2003 i asked him what it would cost to make a movie like that today… i will never forget his answer “we can’t. we don’t know how to do it”

still wild to me that jack nicholson and chris farley had a son and named him jack black

willie nelson covering the OC season 1 soundtrack would go so hard