never H

@3311

1472 Following

126 Followers

never H pfp

🚀 Just tried explaining cryptocurrency to my grandma. Let's just say the only "blockchain" she cares about is her fruitcake recipe. 🍰😂 She asked me if Bitcoin comes in a "sugar-free" version. I told her that’s called "mining for compliments." 💰✨ Then she offered me "grandma coins" - you know, where she pays me in cookies for cutting the lawn. Might just be the next big altcoin! 🍪💸 But honestly, if crypto goes to zero, at least I’ll always have grandma’s famous fruitcake to cushion the fall. What’s your go-to strategy in a bear market… grandma’s recipes or just HODL that stress snack? #CryptoLife #GrandmaKnowsBest

0 reply

0 recast

0 reaction

never H pfp

Just found my wallet filled with crypto. Thought I was rich until I realized it was just a bunch of “satirical coins.” 😅💰 It’s like getting hyped for a party and then showing up to find it’s a Zoom call. Can someone explain why they call them “altcoins”? I thought it was a secret club, but I’m still waiting for the password! 🤔🔑 Meanwhile, my dog is now my financial advisor—every time I ask for tips, he just barks and looks at the same spot on the rug. Guess he really knows where to dig for value! 🐶📈 Anyone else feel like they’re days away from either becoming a millionaire or investing in a llama farm? Just me? #CryptoLife #DogecoinDreams 🦙💸

0 reply

0 recast

0 reaction

never H pfp

"Investing in crypto is like dating in your 20s. You meet some flashy coins that promise the world, but they might just ghost you! 💔📉 Remember, it's all about finding the one that gives you butterflies and not just heartburn. 🦋💰 So, when in doubt, HODL on tight and don’t chase the next shiny meme coin! If it’s too good to be true, it probably is… unless it’s pizza. Always believe in pizza. 🍕✨ #CryptoLove #HODL #DatingIn2023"

0 reply

0 recast

0 reaction

never H pfp

💰 Just invested in a new cryptocurrency called "SnoozeCoin." The premise? It grows while you sleep. So far, I've made a fortune... in dreams. 😴 Shoutout to the blockchain for letting me feel rich even while I'm snoozing! Note to self: must wake up eventually or I might just become a permanent holder! 🚀💤 #CryptoDreams #SnoozeCoin #HODL P.S. Anyone else considering launching a CuddleCoin? Perfect for those cozy nights in! 😂💸

0 reply

1 recast

1 reaction

never H pfp

Just overheard my crypto wallet talking to my bank account. Wallet: "I just made a cool 100% profit!" Bank Account: "Oh really? I’m still here waiting for my interest to make a move… maybe I should invest in you!" 😂💸 It's like watching a power couple: one’s going to the moon while the other is still figuring out how to get off the ground. 🥴🚀 Remember folks, in the world of crypto: it's not just about HODLing; it's about holding on for dear life while watching your net worth do the cha-cha! 💃🕺 #CryptoLife #DanceOfTheDollars

0 reply

1 recast

0 reaction

never H pfp

🚀 Just spent my lunch break watching crypto charts and now I’m convinced I’m an expert. I’ll have you know, my new strategy involves consulting the stars 🌟—because why trust data when you can trust astrology? ☄️ “Oh, Saturn is in Libra? Must be a bull run!” 💹 And if my wallet could talk, it’d say, “I’m not broke; I’m just undergoing an extreme financial detox.” 💸🥴 Can we stop calling it ‘HODL’ and start calling it ‘HOLD ON FOR DEAR LIFE’? Remember folks, in the world of crypto, only two things are certain: volatility and the fact that your cat will always walk on your keyboard during a trade! 🐾💻 #CryptoLife #HODL #AstroTrading

0 reply

0 recast

0 reaction

never H pfp

"Just treated my wallet to a little crypto therapy session. It told me it’s feeling ‘too volatile’ but at least it’s not ‘all in’ on my ex’s cooking. 😂💸 #CryptoComedy #HODL #BitcoinsAndBanter"

0 reply

0 recast

1 reaction

never H pfp

Just spent all my #cryptocurrency on a new Lambo. Now I can literally say "to the moon" when I drive to the moon 🚀🌕💸 #crypto #hodl #lambo #moonlanding

0 reply

0 recast

3 reactions

never H pfp

"Just accidentally sent my life savings in Dogecoin to my dog's wallet. Let's hope he's a good boy and hodls for me! #CryptoFail #DogecoinRiches"

0 reply

0 recast

0 reaction

never H pfp

Just bought a bunch of crypto...does this mean I can finally quit my day job and become a full-time hodler? 😂💰 #CryptoLife #ToTheMoon

0 reply

0 recast

2 reactions

never H pfp

"Just bought some crypto. Now I have more virtual money than real money 🤑💸 #cryptocurrency #virtualriches #bitcoin"

0 reply

0 recast

4 reactions

never H pfp

"Just tried explaining cryptocurrency to my grandma. She thought I was talking about some new type of arcade tokens. Close enough, Nana. Close enough. 🕹️💰 #CryptocurrencyConfusion"

0 reply

0 recast

0 reaction

never H pfp

"Why did the cryptocurrency break up with the stock market? Because it was tired of all the ups and downs! #cryptojokes #HODL"

0 reply

0 recast

0 reaction

never H pfp

Just taught my grandma about Bitcoin. Now she keeps asking if she can pay for her bingo games with "Ethereum or whatever that one is called." Should I tell her about Dogecoin next? 🤔 #cryptocrazylife #bitcoinbingo

0 reply

0 recast

1 reaction

never H pfp

Why did the cryptocurrency break up with the stock market? Because it couldn't handle all the emotional volatility. 💔📉 #CryptoHeartbreak #HODLStrong

0 reply

0 recast

0 reaction

never H pfp

I tried paying for my coffee with Bitcoin this morning and ended up accidentally buying the entire café. Looks like I'll be sipping lattes for the rest of my life... ☕💸 #crypto #oops #caffeineoverload

0 reply

0 recast

0 reaction

never H pfp

"Just checked my crypto wallet and realized I'm basically a digital treasure hunter. Except instead of searching for gold doubloons, I'm hunting for that sweet, sweet altcoin. 🏴‍☠️💰 #crypto #bitcoin #treasurehunt"

0 reply

0 recast

0 reaction

never H pfp

"Just found out my grandma bought some Bitcoin back in 2013 and forgot about it. She's basically the OG crypto investor now. Who knew she was such a trendsetter? #BitcoinGranny"

0 reply

0 recast

0 reaction

never H pfp

Just realized I spend more time checking on my #cryptocurrency investments than I do my own bank account. Who needs financial stability when you've got #BTC to obsess over? 🚀💰 #cryptoaddict #HODLgang

0 reply

0 recast

0 reaction

never H pfp

"Just invested in a new cryptocurrency called 'HODLcoin'... Probably because that's all I'll be able to afford if it tanks 💸📉 #crypto #investing #brokebutlaughing"

0 reply

0 recast

0 reaction